End of Best Week Ever: Cairo

So yesterday morning I had to wake up at 6:30am to finish packing for my very exciting trip that weekend. I needed to catch the 8:23am train to train so that I would make my 2:40pm flight. I hate that we have to start leaving for our flights at least 5 hours before the actual flight leaves because it takes at least 3 solid hours to get to the airport. I had been slightly nervous up to this point about this trip for a number of reasons: I don’t speak the language at all, I heard you needed shots which I didn’t have, and some people had told me that a visa a required. But more importantly, I just want to be at the gate in plenty of time before take off – which I am luckily. So I got on the plane and had to laugh to myself because I was on the aisle reading a book in English for my American Foreign Policy class, the guy in the middle was reading a book in Arabic, and the lady in the window seat was reading a novel in Italian. We had a very diverse row. The plane ride was about three and half hours (which very good food I might add), and then I arrived. IN CAIRO, EGYPT! I packed all my stuff in my backpack and a giant tote bag so I wouldn’t have to deal with lost luggage or trying to find the right baggage claim. I figured that I could get away with lying about getting typhoid and malaria shots, but the visa was going to hard to talk myself through. So I went up to passport control, and the guy flipped through my passport, stopped, and stared at me for a minute. “You don’t have a visa? You need a visa.” Oh no. What do I do? Look at him sadly and confused. “Go to the bank and get one.” So I figured out how easy it is to get a visa in Egypt. I went to the ‘bank’, paid them 15 euro (the sign said $15 US so I felt a little ripped off when I paid 15 euro), I was handed a sticker, and some change back. I had no idea what kind of money Egypt has, but I found out it was Egyptian pounds. So I went back to passport control, they put the sticker on my passport, stamped it and let me in. My first stop: the bathroom. I know this is not something that I really should tell everyone, but it was my first experience in the culture. When I got into the bathroom there was a lady working in there; she opened the bathroom stall door for me and ushered me in. When I was finished I washed my hands, she handed me my towel to dry my hands and then asked for money. Thankfully, I did have some money, but I had money idea what it meant. So far, the Egyptian pound was about as meaningful to me as monopoly money. So I pulled out a pound; she looked at me and said, “Only one pound?” so I gave her another, and she thanked me. I had no idea how much money I had just given the women’s bathroom attendant. The only thing left was to go through customs. I had nothing to declare so I went into the “Nothing to Declare” line. One of the security guards stopped me;

Him: You have nothing to declare?

Me: No

Him: Are you sure?

Me: Yes

Him: Where are you coming from?

Me: Rome

Him: And you want to declare nothing?

Me: Correct

Him (in a huff): Fine

And then he let me go. Honestly, I had nothing to declare. I was bringing in a package of M&Ms and a Special K granola bar – both of which I think you can legally bring into a country without declaring. I was to meet EB and Whitney, two very good family friends, in about an hour. EB was my babysitter when I was younger, and they are both the older sister’s of my best friend Jane so I have known them both for almost two decades, and have been initiated into their family formally. They were coming back from a cruise on the Nile which I was invited on but couldn’t justify skipping so many days of school so close to the end of the semester. But I was randomly searching flights one day and I found a cheap flight to Cairo for this weekend. Okay, back to story. So I plopped myself down in the large waiting area and read for about an hour – fun stuff like A Clockwork Orange. I also did a little people watching, but I wasn’t so sure how obvious I could be about it being an obvious Western woman all by myself. So I mainly kept to myself until I heard “Kate Hartman” and Whitney running towards me. It was great to see her and EB; they had 2 friends with them from the cruise so we (EB) hailed (went up to a driver) a taxi and I got my first experience driving in Cairo. 2 lanes means nothing. If you can squeeze in front of someone else or in-between 2 cars, you go. There were 3 lanes of traffic most times where only 2 cars should really fit. I saw some pretty mosques and sights on the way back to EB’s apartment. I also saw the Nile as we crossed over it in the dark. Her apartment is amazing. It’s so nice and new and spacious. I am not used to it after living with 3 other girls in something half the size. So it was a mildly joint effort by all to make dinner (nachos) and chocolate chip cookies. I don’t think I helped as much as I could have. I opened the red bean cans, ate lots of chocolate chips, taste tested the cookie batter, and watched about 2 dishes, put 5 in the dishwasher, and that’s about all. But EB and Whitney’s friend, Nate, came over and we had a mini fest of nachos and cookies. After that we ended up talking for a long time. Nate and I decided to wake up really early (7am) and go with EB and Lisa to a cemetery and some mosques before Lisa’s noon flight to Dubai. So EB got us a cab and we rode to the City of the Dead. It was quite a unique experience; I was not expecting to be walking through the slums of Cairo since people lived in the City. The City was like a subdivision. There were obvious ins and outs to the area and it was clearly divided from the rest of the city. So the poor Egyptians live in this community with these tombs that are like mausoleums. While in the City we visited 2 mosques. In both of them we went up the minarets which gave us great views of the city. One of the minarets was a little scary since it involved climbing up a metal contraption that did not seen very safe whatsoever. Like I said the views were great; one such view included a herd of goats on a roof next to a satellite. At both mosques we had a mini tour of the building had a small introduction to Islam. I really liked one of the prayers. One of the rooms in the second mosque we saw had a room with a coffin, I think, in it. The man showed us a prayer in which he took off our hijab, rubbed his hand on the wooden gate surrounding the coffin, put the dust on our heads, and put the hijab back on our heads. It had to do with the guy in the coffin being a good man, and now we are good people too. I really liked that prayer. As we were walking from mosque to mosque, like I said, we were not in the best of neighborhood. Also, for whatever reason Egyptian kids tend to throw things at foreigners. EB said that she’s been stoned before by some kids; it’s sort of a problem for Westerners. So we’re walking and come across a group of boys playing soccer; I most definitely flinched, afraid of having the ball kicked in my face. Instead of walking closer to them, we turned around and took a different route; on the other route we came across a little boy and girl with their mother. The little girl went right up to Lisa, one of EB’s friends, and punched her in the crotch. Luckily, Lisa, with her quick reactions, moved her purse into more strategic location. We finished up the mosques, put Lisa in a cab, and walked to another mosque – the Blue Mosque. The Blue Mosque is called that because when the Turks invaded 700 years ago, they decorated the walls with blue tiles from Turkey. From the Blue Mosque EB and I walked to the Citadel. We basically walked all the way around the Citadel before we found the entrance. The moment we walked in 4 boys starting following us, closely. I was afraid my wallet was going to be stolen so EB and I started walking faster. They finally left us alone, but 2 younger boys approached us and wanted pictures with us. 4 pictures total: one with Boy 1, EB, and me; one with Boy 2, EB, and me; one with EB and Boy 2; and one with Boy 1 and me. So here starts the picture taking. EB and I walked into the mosque at the Citadel and just wanted to sit down. We sat against a pillar and just took in the view. All of a sudden a group of boys (ages 11-15) came close to us. They pushed 2 of the boys towards us; “Do you have any water?...I am thirsty.” What? We are in a mosque; obviously we didn’t have any water on us. After the boys left we got swarmed, I’m talking swarmed, with girls. Hundreds of 15 year old girls wanted pictures with us. Hundreds. We had trouble moving from place to place because girls kept wanting their pictures taken. The mosque security finally came over and told the girls to leave us alone. But by that point, EB and I each had our own circle of girls wanting to know our names, nationality and ages. But each time I answered the questions, another girl would run up and ask the exact same questions. It got so crazy. After about 20 minutes, we made an escape to the prison section of the Citadel. There we saw a very detailed map of the area. One section included a cafeteria, gift shop, and a punishment by whipping section. After the prison section of the complex, we went to a military museum on the premise; again, we got attacked by a school group of girls who followed us as much as possible since they still had to stay with their teacher who finally stopped the girls from ‘harassing’ us. That did not work so we finally had to run through the rest of the museum to get away from them. But we did get to see the oldest cannon in the world as well as the world’s greatest warrior. If anyone knows who that is, it would be a great help since the inscription did not tell us who the man was other than the world’s greatest warrior. Once we got back out of the museum we were, once more, attacked by another group of boys. They now have pictures of us to show their friends. We hailed a cab to Zamelek, the island where EB and Whitney live to meet them at a spa. EB had said that the manicures and pedicures were pretty cheap and since my fingernails were pretty dirty, I decided to get them done. Unfortunately, I had the worst lady ever. She had a chip on her shoulder from the beginning. I’m no expert on getting my nails done since I can probably count them on my fingers, but I do know that this one was the shortest by about 30 minutes. When she finished I probably could have snagged every fingernail on a piece of cloth and there was tons of dirt and dust under every nail. It was by far the worst manicure I have ever had. So EB took me up to the front counter to show them, they called the lady back over and told her to finish the job. She basically pushed me back into the seat and made it as painful as possible, pushing all sorts of instruments under my fingernails to get the dirt out. My nails were mostly smooth by the time she was done and about ¾ of the dirt was gone. Needless to say, I can finish it up myself with about a quarter of the pain and none of the attitude. We left the spa without giving her a tip and went to get some French pastries at Fauchon. I think my family went to Fauchon when we were in NYC (did we Mom?) and it was insanely expensive. However, in Egypt, where full meals are less than $2, these pastries were 8 Egyptian pounds (remember that 5 EP = $1 US). So we took the pastries back to the apartment and had lunch and did homework: EB on her translating Arabic articles and me writing my Roman Empire paper. Since no one was done with their homework by dinnertime and since lunch was pastries, we ordered some Chinese takeout for dinner. After dinner EB turned on Jane’s breakup video, a masterpiece if I do say so myself. Wow. Oh, I forgot to mention that EB’s classmate, Christ, met us at the pastry place and was present until a little after the breakup video. He looks like a mix between David Bowie and Christopher Walken; I’m not so sure it’s such a great combo, and unfortunately, his social skills didn’t really help him either. After Mr. Walken left, EB and I got ready for bed and started to watch High School Musical 2 to which we both feel asleep to.

Sunday morning I got to sleep in. For the first time in weeks, I slept under I woke up on my own: no alarm, no nothing. It was wonderful. EB was at her first class for the day (Fridays and Saturdays are the weekends in Egypt), and Whitney was at work. So I had a nice relaxing morning and when EB got back home, we left for the pyramids. The pyramids are just outside the city; from the highway downtown you can see them; they are that close. Now, Egyptian drivers are probably the worst (or best, considering how you look at the situation) in the world. They don’t have lanes, they squeeze into whatever space they can, and they are constantly using their horns to alert other drivers where they are. They are the most aggressive drivers out there; they don’t even stop for pedestrians. However, when they near the pyramids, cab drivers have to go on the defensive. The vendors or whoever they are who try to sell tourist fake tickets or souvenirs, if the cab driver slows down enough, will latch onto the car until they are able to sell you something. The vendors were jumping in front of the car, and our driver was forced to start swerving to miss hitting all these people. On one such swerve we slowed down enough to allow a guy to somehow get into the front passenger seat. Everyone was yelling at him to get out, I think, but he stayed in until we got to the place where taxis drop their passengers. EB paid, but the cabbie wanted more money. I was told to just get out of the car and keep walking which I did, perfectly, I might add. The guy who jumped in the cab followed us for a little bit, telling us something. Italian men and gypsies have almost perfected my ability to totally tune out people which works out perfectly in Egypt as well. We first walked over to the sphinx. On the way there a group of girls wanted to take pictures with us; we obliged since we were already stopped looking at the sphinx, but we did not want that day to be all about the paparazzi again. We had our day of being famous and we just wanted to be tourists and to be left alone. From the sphinx we looked at the pyramids a little bit before getting in line to get tickets to actually go into the biggest one. It was very cool. But I do not recommend it to anyone with back problems or who is out of shape. You are bent over walking up a slippery ramp which you also have to walk down. The lady in front of me on the way up was having some serious problems with it, but regardless, it was very cool. I think we were the actual tomb room, but I’m not sure since one of EB’s friends had all the guidebooks and nothing is labeled. We didn’t have much time at the pyramids because EB had to get to her Arabic translation class. I was going to go to the Egyptian Museum while she did that. However, we were running at 10 minutes late; the traffic stopped a little bit away from the museum but in sight. EB pushed me out of the cab and said she would text me after her class. So, on the opposite side of the street during rush hour in one of the most crowded cities in the world which also does not believe in sidewalks much less crosswalks in the middle of ‘rush hour’, I had to basically frogger myself over to the other side of the road. Once at the museum I walked around for about an hour and half looking at numerous mummies, large statues, model boats, and pieces of papyrus. I don’t think I’ll have a needing to go to another museum or see another mummy for a very long time. After EB’s class she met me outside the museum, and we walked back over to where she goes to school, American University in Cairo where I got to sit in on her calligraphy class. All the grad students were working on their final projects while I was just copying random words or sentences in Arabic the best I could with the calligraphy pen. Needless to say, I was fantastic; the teacher even complimented me! After class we stopped in at a fast food Egyptian restaurant (EB, you’re going to have to help me with the name). There’s only one thing to order there, so you find a table, order a small, medium, or large portion, and a drink, and within seconds you have your food. It was delicious whatever we had; it had rice, rice-a-roni noodles, chick peas, lentils, and some strange tomato and vinegar sauce. Total of 2 small orders (they were pretty decent size) and a Fanta was less than $2 US. I don’t think I can get a Fanta in the US for less than $2. Plus, new fact of the day, the reason the Fanta in Europe and overseas tastes so much better is because they use cane sugar instead of corn fructose syrup stuff the US uses in all its sugary substances. So we finished our snack quickly since we were both very hungry and cabbed back to EB’s. One of the way to the island, the cabbie picked up this guy who turned out to speak English; we’re not sure if he was American or not, but he was born in French Canada. So EB and I were just talking about life, and the guy just butts in. He told us he was sorry about our problems and that he could commiserate with us since he was having a horrible week (it was Sunday). Apparently, Drew (that’s his name) was fired last Wednesday, but rehired on Thursday, and his boss who he hates because she is backstabbing made this huge deal about how Drew was “moving on” and is now throwing him this “moving on” party. Luckily, the cab ride did not last that much longer and he was sort of interesting but very inappropriate and lacking in normal social skills. Back at the apartment EB and I finished watching High School Musical 2; it is definitely not a masterpiece of the cinema, but it was highly entertaining. Whitney came home from work, made some amazing chicken noodle soup, and then her boyfriend Clay came over. Clay seemed very nice. After dinner, since it was Sunday, we all watched Oprah. She had Jerry Seinfeld on talking about his new movie, Bee Movie. And after Oprah, EB and Whitney’s friend Liz came over and we all watched Tori & Dean inn love? I think that’s what it’s called, at least. It’s a reality show about Tori Spelling, daughter of something Spelling who produced tons of television shows like 90210. During reality show Whitney cooked some cookies EB had made 2 nights previously; those were gone in about 5 minutes. They were delicious! I need to learn how to bake cookies and cakes!

Monday came fast. We had to wake up relatively early since I needed to catch a cab at 8am in order to ensure I’d get to the airport in time with all the traffic. On the way to get the cab, we stopped at a food vendor, and EB bought me 4 bags of Doritos. The Doritos in Egypt are different from those in the US and taste very good. We think that they’re baked instead of being fried, and it tastes like a mixture of the Cool Ranch flavor and the Cheese flavor. So I need to make these 4 bags last me a long time! So it was time to say goodbye, EB put me in a cab, and I was off to the airport. The cab driver was a little odd. The entire way there he sang. I mean, he sang with all this might. He also kept pretending to shoot cars that made him angry: both hands off the wheel, holding an invisible rifle or shotgun, and making shooting noises. After shooting the cars, shooting policemen, and making fun of the military (I caught on only because he was humming something that sounded like a national anthem and saluting), he would turn around and smile, looking for me to smile back or laugh. It was just very bizarre. We then ‘talked’ about Bush and Reagan. By that I mean he talked in Arabic, I looked at him blankly, he asked where I came from and listed countries, I said America, and then he said something about Bush and Reagan. Who knows. On the side of the road he picked up this guy near the airport who spoke some English and helped the cabbie find my terminal. I don’t think the cab driver had even been to the airport before from the way he did not understand the signs and made some wrong turns. We got to the terminal and thanked him and made my way inside the airport. It’s a very confusing airport if you are ever there. At least the first time there, I thought it was. I got on the plane fine, but I was not expecting to watch a movie on it. They turned on the newest Die Hard movie. I didn’t know other cultures would enjoy it since it’s mainly about the US and being patriotic and stuff. They did edit some of the scenes though. No kissing, but then again, that’s Egypt. Question: women aren’t supposed to allow anyone but husbands and family members to see them without a hijab or burka, if they wear them. But what happens, come wedding night, when the husband takes off the hijab and notices his new wife is bald or has ears that stick out?